A Nice Afternoon

It was nice having my parents come over today.

The odd thing is that I had my camera out on the side table 

and I didn't take any pictures.

It was a relaxing afternoon and it was nice to see my living room look

like some living went on in it.

 Of course I had candles lit.

Almost every plate & bowl were used.

And finally, a very happy dog.

He loves my parents.

We Have Our Snow

Last night, I heard someone shoveling the sidewalk in front of our bldg.

This morning, the sun is shining, the wind is blowing,

and it's the kind of cold that makes my eyes water

and nose hairs freeze.

There is still some snow coverage but mostly, there's ice.

Crockett didn't seem too pleased.

Maybe I'll try again this year to put those balloon boots on him.

I think it looks pretty, fresh, and clean.

The photo below is a close up of a section of the photo above.

Nature is awesome.

You can't see it, but it is really windy.

I figured how to remove the date stamp.

I'd set it in error.

Icy sidewalk in front of the park.

With our douche bag mayor Rob Ford, the public sidewalks

will most likely remain unattended.

The Hobbit: Peter Jackson's Fifth Video Blog from the Set

There, I Said It

This year, although not entirely in the Christmas mood,

I did say, more than ever before,

"Merry Christmas"

I think I was, in a way, rebelling against the multiculturalism

 oversensitivity that Toronto has become.

Don't get me wrong, I have no problem with multiculturalism.

I do however, as controversial as it may seem,

feel that new immigrants to Toronto need to

understand that for me, being born here, I have the right

to wish people a Merry Christmas without them

getting their knickers in a twist and claiming racism or intolerance.

In all our Toronto TV, radio and print media, we note and celebrate:

Black History Month

Chinese New Year

Passover

Ramadan

Eid

Rosh Hashanha

Yom Kippur

Diwali

Hanukkah

Kwanzaa

So, being born here, why can I not say

without being made to feel like I am an intolerant white supremacist?

Seriously.

Political correctness and the Canadian need to be polite

and sensitive to everyone over myself has really pissed me off.

Everyone in Canada has the right to their own beliefs.

Mine include wishing people a Merry Christmas.

There, I said it.

Californication Season IV

I got my Mr. Season IV of Californication

and we watched it today.

Showtime

I have to say that David Duchovny as Hank Moody

is one charismatic sexy sexy man.

I like the scruffy, need a shower and a shave look,

and he was like that for almost every episode.

Hank Moody is the guy you want to have a 

wild weekend with, but that's it.

David Duchovny plays this character so well.

If he was my husband, I could not watch this show. Ever.

I'm looking forward to Season V.

Merry Christmas

and Happy New Year!

Twas The Afternoon Before...

We had a busy day.

We were up & out by 9:30am.

Back in, comfy jammies on and relaxing by 5:30pm.

Every bone & muscle aches.

I hate shopping walking.

It's more like strolling.

Took Crockett to the park when we got home

and the cold temperatures we've had the

last two days have wilted the weird cabbage plants.

So it looks like no snow for Christmas.

Truthfully, it has made getting out and about easier.

I've enjoyed the crisp cold sunny, dry sidewalk, days.

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey - Trailer

AWESOME

Successful Shopping

Today, I:

1. Bought a really adorable gift bag.

2. Bought a really adorable Santa.

Lost In Translation

One of the reasons I started this blog was that a little over

4 years ago I changed jobs.

I went from a middle management position where 

I did alot of business writing to a

Logistics Administration position where I communicate

via e-mail to people in China.

I feel like I've had to dumb myself down in my e-mail communication,

leaving out unnecessary words so that messages are clear and concise 

and can be easy translatable in translation software.

Sometimes communication is tough and I have to read

received e-mails aloud so I can ask my coworkers,

"What do you interpret that as meaning?"

A perfect example of lost in translation is this

Christmas wish received today from

Yang who works in a factory in Ningbo, China.

I know he means well, but I just don't get what Yang

was trying to say:

 

Have an icy-icy CHRISTMAS, with BUTTERING MSGs, CHOCALATY CALLS, CREAMY THOUGHTS, FRUITY FUNS.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

I Was Tagged!

I was lucky enough to be tagged by Alycia from one of my favorite blogs; 

The Curious Pug   (aka: Monty & Mabel's Mommy.)

Rules: ( That I will NOT be able to comply with! )
1. You must post these rules.
2. Each per­son must post 11 things about them­selves on their blog.
3. Answer the ques­tions the tag­ger set for you in their post, and cre­ate 11 new ques­tions for the peo­ple you tag to answer.
4. You have to choose 11 peo­ple to tag and link them on the post.
5. Go to their page and tell them you have linked him or her.
6. No tag backs.
7. No stuff in the tag­ging sec­tion about ‘you are tagged if you are read­ing this.’ You legit­i­mately have to tag 11 people.

11 Things About Me:
1. I am super emotional and cry at the drop of a hat.
2. I am a little bit mental when it comes to food and beverage expiry dates.
3. I put on one sock then my shoe, then my other sock then my other shoe.
4. Adam is the only person I can sing in front of.
5. I wish I lived closer to my parents. Close enough to stop around for tea after supper.
6. I cannot count the times I've watched all 3 Lord of the Rings and all 8 Harry Potter films on DVD.
7. If I had to choose one style of food to eat forever, I'd go with Chinese.
8. I enjoy ironing and folding laundry.
9. I have Sarcoidosis.
10. I am most happy when I'm at home with Adam & Crockett.
11. I don't know what I want to be when I grow up.

Questions from Alycia:
1. If you could go back in time, what time period would you visit?
The Shire, Middle Earth - Third Age of the Sun, TA2941, by Shire Reckoning. I'd like to be a Hobbit and cook, bake, sew and tend to my garden.

2. What are you looking forward to in 2012?
Adam working and our being able to relax and enjoy life a bit more.

3. Describe one of your hidden talents.
I can do voices and accents. I wish I worked on The Simpson's or The Family Guy or Yo Gabba Gabba.

4. You can only bring what you can carry because zombies/aliens/vampires are attacking! What do you bring?
Water bottle, Extra Strength Motrin, needle and thread, band aids, dried fruit strips, beef jerky, knives, guns and ammo.

5. What's the best vacation you ever took?
Our honeymoon. We only went to Niagara Falls, but we had so much fun!

6. What's your favorite movie or book?
So many......a movie I really love is While You Were Sleeping starring Sandra Bullock & Bill Pullman.

7. If you could have only 1 super power, what would it be and why?
Invisibility.  It would just be so cool to be a fly on the wall.

8. What's the first thing you do after you wake up in the morning?
Um.....tinkle.

9. What is the craziest thing you've ever done?
Tattoo #1, #2 & #4.   #3 was not crazy ;)

10. What are you most proud of?
Our marriage and relationship.

11. Best piece of advice you've ever received.
Save for a rainy day.

So, here is where I kill this game in that I cannot tag 11 people.  Sorry - but the questions have been fun!

30 Things to Start Doing for Yourself

 Here's another great article from Marc and Angel that I hope to put into practice.

It is a long read but totally worth it.

 Remember today, for it is the beginning.
Today marks the start of a brave new future.

Here it is, a positive ‘to-do’ list for the upcoming year – 30 things to start doing for yourself:

1. Start spending time with the right people. – These are the people you enjoy, who love and appreciate you, and who encourage you to improve in healthy and exciting ways.  They are the ones who make you feel more alive, and not only embrace who you are now, but also embrace and embody who you want to be, unconditionally.
2. Start facing your problems head on. – It isn’t your problems that define you, but how you react to them and recover from them.  Problems will not disappear unless you take action.  Do what you can, when you can, and acknowledge what you’ve done.  It’s all about taking baby steps in the right direction, inch by inch.  These inches count, they add up to yards and miles in the long run.
3. Start being honest with yourself about everything. – Be honest about what’s right, as well as what needs to be changed.  Be honest about what you want to achieve and who you want to become.  Be honest with every aspect of your life, always.  Because you are the one person you can forever count on.  Search your soul, for the truth, so that you truly know who you are.  Once you do, you’ll have a better understanding of where you are now and how you got here, and you’ll be better equipped to identify where you want to go and how to get there. 
4. Start making your own happiness a priority. – Your needs matter.  If you don’t value yourself, look out for yourself, and stick up for yourself, you’re sabotaging yourself.  Remember, it IS possible to take care of your own needs while simultaneously caring for those around you.  And once your needs are met, you will likely be far more capable of helping those who need you most.
5. Start being yourself, genuinely and proudly. – Trying to be anyone else is a waste of the person you are.  Be yourself.  Embrace that individual inside you that has ideas, strengths and beauty like no one else.  Be the person you know yourself to be – the best version of you – on your terms.  Above all, be true to YOU, and if you cannot put your heart in it, take yourself out of it.
6. Start noticing and living in the present. – Right now is a miracle.  Right now is the only moment guaranteed to you.  Right now is life.  So stop thinking about how great things will be in the future.  Stop dwelling on what did or didn’t happen in the past.  Learn to be in the ‘here and now’ and experience life as it’s happening.  Appreciate the world for the beauty that it holds, right now.
7. Start valuing the lessons your mistakes teach you. – Mistakes are okay; they’re the stepping stones of progress.  If you’re not failing from time to time, you’re not trying hard enough and you’re not learning.  Take risks, stumble, fall, and then get up and try again.  Appreciate that you are pushing yourself, learning, growing and improving.  Significant achievements are almost invariably realized at the end of a long road of failures.  One of the ‘mistakes’ you fear might just be the link to your greatest achievement yet.
8. Start being more polite to yourself. – If you had a friend who spoke to you in the same way that you sometimes speak to yourself, how long would you allow that person to be your friend?  The way you treat yourself sets the standard for others.  You must love who you are or no one else will.
9. Start enjoying the things you already have. – The problem with many of us is that we think we’ll be happy when we reach a certain level in life – a level we see others operating at – your boss with her corner office, that friend of a friend who owns a mansion on the beach, etc.  Unfortunately, it takes awhile before you get there, and when you get there you’ll likely have a new destination in mind.  You’ll end up spending your whole life working toward something new without ever stopping to enjoy the things you have now.  So take a quiet moment every morning when you first awake to appreciate where you are and what you already have.
10. Start creating your own happiness. – If you are waiting for someone else to make you happy, you’re missing out.  Smile because you can.  Choose happiness.  Be the change you want to see in the world.  Be happy with who you are now, and let your positivity inspire your journey into tomorrow.  Happiness is often found when and where you decide to seek it.  If you look for happiness within the opportunities you have, you will eventually find it.  But if you constantly look for something else, unfortunately, you’ll find that too.  
11. Start giving your ideas and dreams a chance. – In life, it’s rarely about getting a chance; it’s about taking a chance.  You’ll never be 100% sure it will work, but you can always be 100% sure doing nothing won’t work.  Most of the time you just have to go for it!  And no matter how it turns out, it always ends up just the way it should be.  Either you succeed or you learn something.  Win-Win.
12. Start believing that you’re ready for the next step. – You are ready!  Think about it.  You have everything you need right now to take the next small, realistic step forward.  So embrace the opportunities that come your way, and accept the challenges – they’re gifts that will help you to grow.
13. Start entering new relationships for the right reasons. – Enter new relationships with dependable, honest people who reflect the person you are and the person you want to be.  Choose friends you are proud to know, people you admire, who show you love and respect – people who reciprocate your kindness and commitment.  And pay attention to what people do, because a person’s actions are much more important than their words or how others represent them.
14. Start giving new people you meet a chance. – It sounds harsh, but you cannot keep every friend you’ve ever made.  People and priorities change.  As some relationships fade others will grow.  Appreciate the possibility of new relationships as you naturally let go of old ones that no longer work.  Trust your judgment.  Embrace new relationships, knowing that you are entering into unfamiliar territory.  Be ready to learn, be ready for a challenge, and be ready to meet someone that might just change your life forever.
15. Start competing against an earlier version of yourself. – Be inspired by others, appreciate others, learn from others, but know that competing against them is a waste of time.  You are in competition with one person and one person only – yourself.  You are competing to be the best you can be.  Aim to break your own personal records.
16. Start cheering for other people’s victories. – Start noticing what you like about others and tell them.  Having an appreciation for how amazing the people around you are leads to good places – productive, fulfilling, peaceful places.  So be happy for those who are making progress.  Cheer for their victories.  Be thankful for their blessings, openly.  What goes around comes around, and sooner or later the people you’re cheering for will start cheering for you.
17. Start looking for the silver lining in tough situations. – When things are hard, and you feel down, take a few deep breaths and look for the silver lining – the small glimmers of hope.  Remind yourself that you can and will grow stronger from these hard times.  And remain conscious of your blessings and victories – all the things in your life that are right.  Focus on what you have, not on what you haven’t.
18. Start forgiving yourself and others. – We’ve all been hurt by our own decisions and by others.  And while the pain of these experiences is normal, sometimes it lingers for too long.  We relive the pain over and over and have a hard time letting go.  Forgiveness is the remedy.  It doesn’t mean you’re erasing the past, or forgetting what happened.  It means you’re letting go of the resentment and pain, and instead choosing to learn from the incident and move on with your life.
19. Start helping those around you. – Care about people.  Guide them if you know a better way.  The more you help others, the more they will want to help you.  Love and kindness begets love and kindness.  And so on and so forth.
20. Start listening to your own inner voice. – If it helps, discuss your ideas with those closest to you, but give yourself enough room to follow your own intuition.  Be true to yourself.  Say what you need to say.  Do what you know in your heart is right.
21. Start being attentive to your stress level and take short breaks. – Slow down.  Breath.  Give yourself permission to pause, regroup and move forward with clarity and purpose.  When you’re at your busiest, a brief recess can rejuvenate your mind and increase your productivity.  These short breaks will help you regain your sanity and reflect on your recent actions so you can be sure they’re in line with your goals.
22. Start noticing the beauty of small moments. – Instead of waiting for the big things to happen – marriage, kids, big promotion, winning the lottery – find happiness in the small things that happen every day.  Little things like having a quiet cup of coffee in the early morning, or the delicious taste and smell of a homemade meal, or the pleasure of sharing something you enjoy with someone else, or holding hands with your partner.  Noticing these small pleasures on a daily basis makes a big difference in the quality of your life.
23. Start accepting things when they are less than perfect. – Remember, ‘perfect’ is the enemy of ‘good.’  One of the biggest challenges for people who want to improve themselves and improve the world is learning to accept things as they are.  Sometimes it’s better to accept and appreciate the world as it is, and people as they are, rather than to trying to make everything and everyone conform to an impossible ideal.  No, you shouldn’t accept a life of mediocrity, but learn to love and value things when they are less than perfect.
24. Start working toward your goals every single day. – Remember, the journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.  Whatever it is you dream about, start taking small, logical steps every day to make it happen.  Get out there and DO something!  The harder you work the luckier you will become.  While many of us decide at some point during the course of our lives that we want to answer our calling, only an astute few of us actually work on it.  By ‘working on it,’ I mean consistently devoting oneself to the end result. 
25. Start being more open about how you feel. – If you’re hurting, give yourself the necessary space and time to hurt, but be open about it.  Talk to those closest to you.  Tell them the truth about how you feel.  Let them listen.  The simple act of getting things off your chest and into the open is your first step toward feeling good again.
26. Start taking full accountability for your own life. – Own your choices and mistakes, and be willing to take the necessary steps to improve upon them.  Either you take accountability for your life or someone else will.  And when they do, you’ll become a slave to their ideas and dreams instead of a pioneer of your own.  You are the only one who can directly control the outcome of your life.  And no, it won’t always be easy.  Every person has a stack of obstacles in front of them.  But you must take accountability for your situation and overcome these obstacles.  Choosing not to is choosing a lifetime of mere existence.
27. Start actively nurturing your most important relationships. – Bring real, honest joy into your life and the lives of those you love by simply telling them how much they mean to you on a regular basis.  You can’t be everything to everyone, but you can be everything to a few people.  Decide who these people are in your life and treat them like royalty.  Remember, you don’t need a certain number of friends, just a number of friends you can be certain of.
28. Start concentrating on the things you can control. – You can’t change everything, but you can always change something.  Wasting your time, talent and emotional energy on things that are beyond your control is a recipe for frustration, misery and stagnation.  Invest your energy in the things you can control, and act on them now.
29. Start focusing on the possibility of positive outcomes. – The mind must believe it CAN do something before it is capable of actually doing it.  The way to overcome negative thoughts and destructive emotions is to develop opposing, positive emotions that are stronger and more powerful.  Listen to your self-talk and replace negative thoughts with positive ones.  Regardless of how a situation seems, focus on what you DO WANT to happen, and then take the next positive step forward.  No, you can’t control everything that happens to you, but you can control how you react to things.  Everyone’s life has positive and negative aspects – whether or not you’re happy and successful in the long run depends greatly on which aspects you focus on.  
30. Start noticing how wealthy you are right now. – Henry David Thoreau once said, “Wealth is the ability to fully experience life.”  Even when times are tough, it’s always important to keep things in perspective.  You didn’t go to sleep hungry last night.  You didn’t go to sleep outside.  You had a choice of what clothes to wear this morning.  You hardly broke a sweat today.  You didn’t spend a minute in fear.  You have access to clean drinking water.  You have access to medical care.  You have access to the Internet.  You can read.  Some might say you are incredibly wealthy, so remember to be grateful for all the things you do have.

Funk Be Gone. Please.

Finally my little corner of the world is back to normal.

Almost 2 weeks ago, Adam's computer bit the dust.

What was to be a small fix ended up being a major overhaul.

I don't like using Adam's computer for a number of reasons 

and he doesn't like me using it either.

I get it, because I hate it when he uses mine.

He's an Internet Explorer.

I'm a Firefox.

He's a multiple window open multitasker.

I am focused on one thing at a time.

 He's a Forum Admin.

I'm a Blogger.

His mouse is sticky & covered in hot sauce.

Mine is not.

Some say separate bathrooms is the recipe for a happy marriage. 

I say it's separate computers. 

My computer is now back on my homemade desk in the

corner of our bedroom with my dog sleeping happily behind

me on his pillow on the bed.

Adam is in his man cave with all the settings on his computer

as he needs them to be and no longer needs mine.

The world again makes sense.

Sadly, that was not the only thing keeping me away

from the keyboard.

I could have updated my blog during the 10 minutes

a day that Adam stepped away from the screen but I

have been in a bit of a funk.

It was even bothering me that I wasn't keeping up with Radvent.

A pre-Christmas, lack of daylight, S.A.D,

Black Dog funk.

The weather has been wonderful.

Bad for the planet, animals and plants, but good

for someone with a pedestrian lifestyle who is prone to

falling on the ice.

I've said and felt since the end of November

that I'm just not feeling Christmas this year.

I want to, I'm just not.

Is it because I don't have enough disposable income to buy quality gifts?

Because I'm not willing to go into debt for a few luxuries?

Because Christmas is magical for kids and we don't have kids?

Because we haven't decorated?

Because I have NO IDEA what to get for anyone?

Who knows.

I am looking forward to having some time off.

For the 1st time EVER, I will be off between

Christmas & New Year.

It's not even booked vacation time.

I'll be off Friday at noon returning to work

on Monday Jan 2'12.

What are we doing?

Nothing.

Cuddling on the couch with Adam & Crockett.

I want my parents to come over and spend time here with us.

I want to watch movies and documentaries.

(All 3 Extended BluRay & Extras of the Lord of the Rings Trilogy and

maybe even trying a Harry Potter Marathon)

I want to go see the shop Christmas Windows downtown.

I want to go up to the restaurant at The Bay on the top floor

and eat  a Club Sandwich and French Fries as I look out over 

The Eaton's Center and City Hall and watch all the people moving about in the city.

I want a Candy Cane Latte.

(Adam graciously offered to put some toothpaste in my coffee as an alternative)

I'd love to go skating a City Hall but won't as I wish to remain injury free.

I want to sit & wait while Adam goes to music stores and

browses through thousands of CDs and DVDs.

I want to bake and prepare delicious meals.

I want to knit.

I want to be domestic and do laundry.

I want to tidy & reorganize my DVDs.

I just want to enjoy waking up and not rushing out to catch a bus. 

I want to sleep well.

I want to take Crockett for walks.

Take photographs.

I want to write.

I want to read.

I want to take long bubble baths.

I want to organize my (pardon my french) shit to start off 2012 right.

 Too much to ask?

I don't think so.

It is amazing.

I started this blog in July 2010.

There are a few blogs that I read daily.

They are written by people I admire and who inspire me.

A few feel like they are my friends although we've never met.

I've been introduced to creative, smart, witty, funny, artsy-crafty,

dog and cat loving people.

Being away from my blog for even a few days made me feel odd.

I know I am not a writer but for me, this blog is my platform, 

it is my therapy, it is my place for exercising my brain

and challenging myself.

Right now, sitting here writing while

I drink a nice cup of tea, I'm already feeling a bit better.

This Whole 99% Thing

I get it, I do.

I am concerned with the disappearing middle class.

I feel that there are generations younger than

me that have a (pardon my french) fucked up

sense of entitlement and no money management skills.

Occupy Toronto turned into a few seriously dedicated folks

mixed in with Toronto's young adult homeless population

setting up a tent city that resulted in the true message being lost.

There are CEO's and CFO's, movie stars and professional 

athletes all over the world making far too much money.

There are teachers and nurses all over the world making

far too little money.

I'm in a tough spot socioeconomically.

 Adam & I are in our 40's, married and childless.

We were both born in Canada.

Adam has been out of work for longer than anticipated

and we live on one income.

 We are not property owners.

We do not own a car.

I pay my taxes.

We live within our means.

We have the necessities.
 

Take all of the above into account and

we qualify for exactly nothing in regards

to Govt programs or tax breaks.

Provincially and Federally

we are invisible.

We don't matter.

I DO NOT want a handout.

That is not what this is about.

It's about a frustration of being invisible.

I see the 1% at my office everyday.

I see the 99% in life, on the bus, subway, everywhere, everyday.

The parking lot at work consists of a Maserati, a Jaguar,

2 Lexus's, an Audi, and a Camry.

I take the bus.

Am I bitter?

Yes and no. 

More no than yes.

How much the world has changed this first 40 years of my life has

me frightened for the changes of the next 40 years.

Radvent 12/11

After a long week of work and commuting, there isn't alot of time

to run errands and get the chores done during the week.

My preference is to get everything done on Saturday so we can

spend a task free relaxing Sunday.

Adam took care of laundry on Friday.

Yesterday was a busy long day.

Today, Adam, Crockett and myself 

are deserving of a lazy day.

Radvent 12/10

I write for myself.

I find it therapeutic.

It helps me organize my thoughts.

I write to make my husband proud of me.

Rules I find important are proper spelling and grammar.

If anyone writes me an e-mail or a text or a note or anything

that is not proper English or is in anagrams, I cannot read it.

I don't want to try to figure out phonetically what they mean.

The more I write, the more I become interested in language

and realize that writing is so much more than sitting in front of

a keyboard.

Neverland

Adam showed me this trailer for Neverland.

It is showing on the Space channel December 18th & 19th.

Peter Pan being one of my favorite stories, I am

really looking forward to this.

 

Neverland: 
Peter and his streetwise gang are transported from turn-of-the-century London into an enchanting parallel world where time stands still and an adventure awaits like nothing you've seen before. Stars Rhys Ifans, Bob Hoskins, Charlie Rowe, Anna Friel and Kiera Knightley as the voice of Tinkerbell. 

Radvent 12/9

Thoughts and words make a difference.

I am not one who can look in the mirror and recite,

"I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me."

I do know that if I get down in the dumps and starting thinking,

....if one more thing happens....

I can be sure one more thing will happen.

Instead, I consciously think of all the blessing I have

and how lucky I am.

I truly does influence the mood I wake up in

and how I go about my day.

Radvent 12/8

Right now, with life the way it is, it is almost critical

that I stay within my comfort zone.

I need to stay balanced, on a merry-go-round.

A Roller Coaster right now would not be good

for my mental health.

I also consider myself lucky that I am

able to live a merry-go-round existence at the moment.

Comfort for me is security.

Rent and bills paid.

Food in the pantry.

Crockett happy.

I need this comfort right now so that when

things change, I'll be ready to ride the Roller Coaster.

In the front seat, with my arms raised up over my head.

Radvent 12/7

I've never been a big traveler.

It wasn't something I was interested in but

I love reading books about far off and distant lands.

I love history and museums and architecture and art and documentaries.

There are places, as I age, that I realize I must visit.

I really want to go to the Grand Canyon.

I want to see both the Mona Lisa & the ceiling 

of the Sisteen Chapel with my own eyes.

Radvent 12/6

This is a good topic for me.

I am not going to write a post.

I am going to log off the computer

and START the knitting I've been wanting to start

for the last couple of weeks.

Click HERE to learn more about Radvent.

A Visitor at the Window

I was fast asleep, it was just midnight and

Adam came in and woke me up by saying there

was a Raccoon at our kitchen window.

I was up, grabbed my glasses and camera

and took the 12 steps from my side of the

bed to the kitchen entrance.

This is what I saw.

I was excited and terrified!

It was so cute and so scary.

Not full grown, smaller than Crockett.

Sitting on the window sill to get out of the rain.

That was my one window I was ok leaving open

if I wasn't in the room.

Not any more!

He's a city Raccoon!

Radvent 12/5

I thought I'd doodle a few Christmasy things

to help me get in the festive mood.

Sadly, not happening.

Except now I want to eat a Candy Cane!

Click HERE to learn more about Radvent.

95 Questions to Help You Find Meaning and Happiness

 Another thought provoking post on Marc and Angel Hack Life full of self discovery questions.

Some of these require deep thought and extreme honesty.

I think it's healthy to ask ourselves these kinds of questions

every now and then to check in on where we are compared to where we want to be.

Sometimes day to day life gets in the way of personal growth.

1. In one sentence, who are you?
2. Why do you matter?
3. What is your life motto?
4. What’s something you have that everyone wants?
5. What is missing in your life?
6. What’s been on your mind most lately?
7. Happiness is a ________?
8. What stands between you and happiness?
9. What do you need most right now?
10. What does the child inside you long for?
11. What is one thing right now that you are totally sure of?
12. What’s been bothering you lately?
13. What are you scared of?
14. What has fear of failure stopped you from doing?
15. What will you never give up on?
16. What do you want to remember forever?
17. What makes you feel secure?
18. Which activities make you lose track of time?
19. What’s the most difficult decision you’ve ever made?
20. What’s the best decision you’ve ever made?
21. What are you most grateful for?
22. What is worth the pain?
23. In order of importance, how would you rank: happiness, money, love, health, fame?
24. What is something you’ve always wanted, but don’t yet have?
25. What was the most defining moment in your life during this past year?
26. What’s the number one change you need to make in your life in the next twelve months?
27. What’s the number one thing you want to achieve in the next five years?
28. What is the biggest motivator in your life right now?
29. What will you never do?
30. What’s something you said you’d never do, but have since done?
31. What’s something new you recently learned about yourself?
32. What do you sometimes pretend to understand that you really do not?
33. In one sentence, what do you wish for your future self?
34. What worries you most about the future?
35. When you look into the past, what do you miss most?
36. What’s something from the past that you don’t miss at all?
37. What recently reminded you of how fast time flies?
38. What is the biggest challenge you face right now?
39. In one word, how would you describe your personality?
40. What never fails to frustrate you?
41. What are you known for by your friends and family?
42. What’s something most people don’t know about you?
43. What’s a common misconception people have about you?
44. What’s something a lot of people do that you disagree with?
45. What’s a belief you hold with which many people disagree?
46. What’s something that’s harder for you than it is for most people?
47. What are the top three qualities you look for in a friend?
48. If you had a friend who spoke to you in the same way that you sometimes speak to yourself, how long would you allow that person to be your friend?
49. When you think of ‘home,’ what, specifically, do you think of?
50. What’s the most valuable thing you own?
51. If you had to move 3000 miles away, what would you miss most?
52. What would make you smile right now?
53. What do you do when nothing else seems to make you happy?
54. What do you wish did not exist in your life?
55. What should you avoid to improve your life?
56. What is something you would hate to go without for a day?
57. What’s the biggest lie you once believed was true?
58. What’s something bad that happened to you that made you stronger?
59. What’s something nobody could ever steal from you?
60. What’s something you disliked when you were younger that you truly enjoy today?
61. What are you glad you quit?
62. What do you need to spend more time doing?
63. What are you naturally good at?
64. What have you been counting or keeping track of recently?
65. What has the little voice inside your head been saying lately?
66. What’s something you should always be careful with?
67. What should always be taken seriously?
68. What should never be taken seriously?
69. What are three things you can’t get enough of?
70. What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you?
71. What fascinates you?
72. What’s the difference between being alive and truly living?
73. What’s something you would do every day if you could?
74. At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive?
75. Which is worse, failing or never trying?
76. What makes you feel incomplete?
77. When did you experience a major turning point in your life?
78. What or who do you wish you lived closer to?
79. If you had the opportunity to get a message across to a large group of people, what would your message be?
80. What’s something you know you can count on?
81. What makes you feel comfortable?
82. What’s something about you that has never changed?
83. What will be different about your life in exactly one year?
84. What mistakes do you make over and over again?
85. What do you have a hard time saying “no” to?
86. Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing?
87. What’s something that used to scare you, but no longer does?
88. What promise to yourself do you still need to fulfill?
89. What do you appreciate most about your current situation?
90. What’s something simple that makes you smile?
91. So far, what has been the primary focus of your life?
92. How do you know when it’s time to move on?
93. What’s something you wish you could do one more time?
94. When you’re 90-years-old, what will matter to you the most?
95. What would you regret not fully doing, being, or having in your life?

Radvent 12/4

I am a caring person.

I care about and for people.

I take care of Crockett.

If someone I love needs caring for, I'd be the first

one there, no questions asked.

For a long time I didn't care for myself.

I've started to change that.

I realize that in order to be able to care for others

I need to care for myself.

I used to care about what other people's opinions were more than my own.

Thank goodness with age and experience and listening to my

inner voice, I've come to realize that there are 

opinions that matter and opinions that don't.

Click HERE to learn more about Radvent.

Radvent 12/3

 I don't think I am a fascinating person.

I don't have a special or unique talent.

I haven't travelled to far off destinations and

I don't have wordly stories to tell.

I don't feel that people are drawn to me in 

social or group situations.

I do however still possess and am filled with fascination.

I am fascinated by many things.

I am interested in many things.

I like to talk about and learn about different things.

I am fascinated by Crockett.

I would love to know, just for 5 minutes, what it is like

to see the world from his dog perspective.

I am fascinated by nature.

I am fascinated by weather and clouds.

I am fascinated by stars.

When I go places, I look at and take in the details.

I'm the person who can leave a room after 5 minutes

and tell you everything that was in that room.

When I look at art or paintings I normally start from the outside in.

I hope I am able to maintain this level of fascination & awe with life as I age.

 Click HERE to learn more about Radvent.

We Tried

Crockett and I didn't make the Dog party today.

Not for a lack of trying.

The Subway just didn't cooperate with us and

I seemed to not take into consideration that

being December everyone would be out shopping.

The subway was packed full of people and bags.

Then there was a delay due to passenger assistance

on a train that has us at a dead stop in the middle

of a tunnel for 15 minutes.

By the time we started moving again, we'd traveled only 5 of 23 stops.

I'd had enough.

We got off and came back home.

 It's beautiful outside and we had a nice

leisurely walk home from the Subway Station.

(See Project 365 for Crockett bumping into Wilson)

With the warm weather & lack of snow,

there are many fat happy squirrels about.

When we got home it felt as though we'd been

out forever and accomplished nothing.

At least we both got fresh air.

Radvent 12/2

The key to keeping your balance is knowing when you've lost it. Anonymous

As a teenager, I was always busy. School, friends, figure skating, swimming, band, volleyball, badminton, soccer and the list goes on.  I was lucky, it was the 80's. I had no issue with balance and a large part of that was due to a Mom who took such great care of me and let me sleep in on the weekends.

My 20's were tough.  I had moved away from where I grew up, away from all my friends and all that I knew. My job for the first few years was a 4pm - 11pm shift. That didn't give me too much time for a social life. I didn't have a problem with balance per se, I had no balance. I had no life.

By my mid 30's, I was happily married and for the first time in a long time I felt as though I had a life/work balance.  That was it, it was a life/work balance. Not a life/work/recreational balance. 

I'm now 43 years old and a total homebody. I even enjoy being by myself sometimes, I need it. I need that quiet time to just think, walk, enjoy nature, breathe deeply. It's the LIFE part of the equation that brings me the most joy and happiness. The LIFE part for me is family, home, sharing the tasks of daily life with Adam. I admit, I am too comfortable with my lack of social/recreational activities and that is the part of the balance equation I will be working on in the coming year. I'm thinking maybe a book club or an art & crafts group, maybe a yoga class.

I will say that if I ever do feel off balance, I sleep.  I mean a weekend sleep marathon. Those are the best.

* * *

The 3 most important things I need to do this evening are:

1. Give Crockett a bath.  

We are going to a Dog Party tomorrow. He got an invitation from my boss's dog Sasha the Sheltie to attend her 10th birthday party. There'll be 5 dogs there. I have NO IDEA what to expect. If nothing else it'll give me good material for a blog post :) I will of course take my camera with me.

2. Sort the laundry.

The laundry has been neglected this week. The overflowing hamper is making me mental crazy go-nuts.

3. Be in bed and asleep by midnight. 

No sitting in front of my lap top into the wee hours of the morning.

 Click HERE to learn more about Radvent.

Radvent Blog Journaling Project 2011

One of my favorite blogs, that I've mentioned several times

on my blog and has given me inspiration is Alycia's

The Curious Pug

I have her button over there to the right- - - - >

Alycia is participating again this year in

Princess Lasertron's Radvent 2011

and I think I too will participate.

 

What is challenging you the most right now?

Honestly, it has been day to day life. Everything seems to be a struggle. I feel overwhelmed more often than not.  I don't know where to begin and I end up shutting down and watching movies to escape reality. 

- The Mr. has been out of work now for longer than expected. I stress about ends meeting.

- My 20+ hour a week public transit commute to work sucks the life out of me.

- I suffer with depression that gets a little more difficult to cope with this time of year with the lack of sunlight.

- My pants are a bigger size than I'd like and I just can't seem to keep my nutrition on track.

- I haven't really moved my body or worked up a real sweat in what feels like forever.

- I'm neglecting the laundry and I hate hate hate when it piles up.

- One of the most challenging things I face lately is staying kind and not turning into a total bitch.

...and how can you be grateful for it?

I am grateful for how I have handled these challenges. I have focused on the positive, been grateful for what we do have, counted my blessings and started doing things that give me joy, like knitting, drawing, painting, reading and taking photographs. I am grateful because what all of these challenges have shown me is that I have a solid and loving marriage.  I am strong. I am resilient. I have a few people in my life who really care about, love me and have helped my through my challenges in so many ways (Thanks Mom & Dad!). I am on medication that helps me and hasn't turned me into a zombie. Mostly I am grateful that the majority of these challenges are temporary.

Reflect on one challenging thing in the past year that you kicked butt at.

Dealing with my depression and anxiety.  I did not want to go on medication. Previous medications helped with the sadness and melancholy but they took away all emotion. I was scared that would happen again. I finally opened up to my MD, told her everything and we made a plan together. Dealing with the depression took away the anxiety.

...what would you have told yourself?

There is nothing wrong with admitting you need help and asking for it.

Journal 3 times each week of December.

Although I have this blog, I still keep a written journal and 3 times a week is an excellent attainable goal.